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12 min read

Walking the Camino gave me blisters, good company, and these seven lessons

220 kilometres of questions

Jessica is a Formation Tutor at St Mellitus College, and completing a PhD in Pauline anthropology, 

A pilgrim with a red backpack heads off.
Shirley Roots, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons.

It was Sunday night, and I was packing my bag. On Monday, I flew to Porto, Portugal, to begin walking a stretch of the Camino de Santiago. I had taken some extended leave from work to mark 10 years of working and wanted to take some time to reflect and hear from God. As I was packing, I was listening to a sermon online. The preacher suddenly said, “You don’t need to walk the Camino de Santiago to hear from God!” Ah. Good point. Nevertheless, it was all booked, so I set off to embark on this pilgrimage.  

The Camino de Santiago is a popular pilgrimage route, with a network of routes all leading to the Cathedral of Santiago de Compostela, the resting place of the apostle St James. On average, around 200,000 pilgrims complete The Way of St James each year, with 2024 closing in on half a million pilgrims. 

They say the Camino “calls” you, and for whatever reason, people respond by walking hundreds of kilometres. I set out on this pilgrimage with a backpack and some good walking shoes (or so I thought), hoping for some time out, beauty, and time and space to hear from God. What I didn’t anticipate was how the Camino would hold up a mirror to my inner life, revealing patterns and lessons I didn’t know I needed. 

The Camino was many things, but above all, it was a space. Space to be and reflect on the little lessons along the way. Here are the seven things that walking 220km of the Camino de Santiago taught me.  

It is ok for questions to be left unanswered 

There is a general thought on the Camino that most pilgrims come with a question. Something we are mulling over while walking, perhaps hoping for a resolution when the walk culminates in Santiago de Compostela. It is therefore not uncommon for one of the first things people ask you whilst walking to be “What question are you bringing to the Camino?” Which is a bold question from a stranger who doesn’t know my last name. Nevertheless, these kinds of questions are what bond you with others so quickly, as you share stories of what has led you to walk this path. There was a question I was carrying with me. One that was unanswered.  

In the evenings and quieter afternoons, I had space to read. I had a Kindle and was enjoying having multiple books at my disposal. I was re-reading Augustine’s Confessions. In Book 6, he writes about humanity's longing for our questions to be answered; he writes, “for it is better for them to find You (God) and the questions unanswered, than to find the answers without finding You.” I stopped still. There are many things in life for which we don’t have the answer, often related to pain, suffering, or injustice. A friend once reminded me of the story of Job in the Bible. A man who experiences deep pain and suffering. When Job confronts God and asks Him repeated questions about why he let this happen, God doesn’t answer any of his questions; instead, He questions Job. Job is left in awe of God and his character, proclaiming, “Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know.”  

There are questions we carry in life, but the words of Augustine and the story of Job reminded me that if we find God, our unanswered questions are safe in the arms of those strong enough to carry them. It was a helpful reminder that not all the questions we have need an answer. There is a possibility of being content with the unknown. 

We are better, together  

I wasn’t going into this walk to make friends. For me, it was a spiritual pilgrimage to hear from God and reflect on my life. I thought I would spend my days in silent contemplative prayer, blissfully gazing upon God’s creation and skipping from town to town. This all changed at the end of day two. About 50 kilometres into my walk, I developed some terrible blisters. My shoes (which fit perfectly before) had started to rub and gave me the worst blisters I have ever had. The Portuguese coast was hot, and I’d gone the wrong way, so I spent around five kilometres walking alone. I arrived at my Albergue that evening broken and in pain.  

After dinner, I was tending to my broken feet when a girl I had zig-zagged with on the walk came to chat. We’ll call her, Evie. I admitted I was finding this all really hard, and Evie shared the same, only her day had been lifted by walking with another pilgrim. She had also begun the day hobbling in pain along the path, but when she got chatting to another pilgrim, she was no longer focusing on her pain, but on the conversation with another.  

 The next morning, I set off, hobbling along the path, and questioned how I would be able to complete the day’s 28 kilometres. When I was behind, I heard someone shout “Jess!”. It was a girl I had shared a bunk with on the first night at the hostel, Jamie. She arrived like an angel the Lord had sent to help me get through today. There was no way I was going to make it on my own. We spent the day walking, talking, and getting coffee, passing the time until all of a sudden, we found ourselves in the next town. I’d done it! We’d done it.  

This taught me that my pain can often draw me inwards, and when our pain is all we see, the journey ahead feels impossible. However, turning outward and sharing with those around us takes our attention away from our own experience and allows us to see the other. Christians say we are all part of the “body of Christ”, as the apostle St Paul described us - called to “bear one another’s burdens”.  As it turned out, walking and journeying with others would be one of the biggest gifts of this Camino. Sharing and travelling with one another’s joy and pain made the way ahead seem so much more hopeful.  

It is important to address things when they are small 

I learned this the hard way—through a blister. Around the 20-kilometre mark on the first day of the walk, I began to feel that tell-tale “hot spot” on my little toe. What I should have done then and there was stop, remove my shoe, and treat it with a blister plaster. But instead, I pushed on for another 15 kilometres, determined to reach the hostel without delay. By the time I arrived, my toe had swollen to three times its usual size, and the damage was done. The situation got so bad that I had to buy new shoes halfway through the Camino, and gained another 10 blisters across both feet for good measure.  

Looking back, it was a minor issue that quickly escalated into a much bigger one because I ignored it. It’s a lesson that extends beyond foot care. Tiny irritations, unhelpful habits, or unresolved tensions can quietly build momentum until they begin to shape us in a negative way. It is an age-old human trait. Another book that accompanied me on this pilgrimage was the Bible. A text I had walked with my whole life.  In the Bible, these unhelpful habits are frequently referred to as “sin”. The building up of things in our life that do not make us fully alive. Walking, I reflected on the little habits I form or the thoughts I allow to take hold begin to form and shape me in ways I might not be aware of until it is too late. As I tended to my broken feet each evening, it was a reminder that it is helpful to pause and address things when they are still small, to pray and bring them before God. It makes for a much more enjoyable journey. 

It is never too late to turn around 

I did this walk alone, with the gracious support of my husband, who sadly couldn’t get the time off work. My husband and I enjoy hiking together, and when we do, he has the role of “map reader.” Without him here, I was now responsible for navigating my route each day and picking the right course. There was one morning when I set off early with no other pilgrims around. On this day, I intended to hug the coast, always keeping the sea on my left, as this walk was much flatter and shorter than an alternative route that took you inland across varying terrain. 

As my day started, I realised I was heading away from the sea and up and out of town. This wasn’t the route I’d planned. I paused to look at my map and realised I was following the wrong one. What do I do? I was 15 minutes in the wrong direction. In that moment, I remembered something my husband had once said on another hike when we went the wrong way: “It is never too late to turn around.” I did just that. Swallowed the loss of 15 minutes the wrong way to get back on course.  

In life, there are times when we think we have gone too far down the wrong path, that we are beyond the point of no return. But in God’s story of grace, it is never too late to turn around. No detour is final. We are always invited to course-correct, to reorient ourselves toward truth, peace, and purpose. Sometimes, the holiest thing we can do is stop, look honestly at where we are, and have the humility to turn back. Even a misstep can become part of the pilgrimage if it eventually leads us back home.  

Rest is not failure. 

I made a rookie mistake in planning this walk: I didn’t plan a rest day. “How hard can walking for 10 days be?” I thought to myself. Turns out, very. My feet were painful. My blisters had blisters. I couldn’t stand without winching in pain. But I wanted to finish. So, I need to rest. One day, I decided to surrender my trainers and take the train. I felt like a failure.  

One of the repeated instructions in the Bible given to God’s people to live well is to “keep the sabbath holy”. To set one day of rest aside each week, as we see God do in creation, and how he commands his people. In our high-paced Western society, taking time off to stop and disconnect can feel counter-cultural. Walter Brueggemann discusses how the sabbath is an act of resistance to our consumer-driven culture. In the constant rat race of Western culture, the Sabbath provides an opportunity to rest and be still amidst the chaos, restoring us to our true humanity.   

Taking this day of rest on the Camino helped me to lean into the rhythms of grace and rest that, as a Christian, I am called to participate in. For me, it was learning that rest here was not failure, but a necessary part of the journey. The most helpful thing I could do was pause, not push on.  

We crave rhythm, ritual and simplicity 

On a multi-day hike, you quickly settle into a rhythm. Wake up. Coffee. Walk. Coffee. Walk. Lunch. Walk. Coca-Cola. Check-in. Shower. Aperol Spritz. Read. Dinner. Pack your bag for tomorrow. Sleep. Repeat. The cadence of the days, though physically demanding, was strangely comforting. There was something profoundly grounding about knowing what came next, and being free from the decision fatigue that so often clutters everyday life. 

I carried only the simple things I needed on my back. Halfway through, I even threw away some of my makeup to save weight, and I didn’t miss it. Life stripped back to the essentials felt freeing. The Camino quietly reoriented me toward simplicity, not as deprivation, but as a kind of clarity. 

In this pared-back way of living, rituals emerged, ordinary acts repeated with intention. I am also aware of what a privilege this was, comparing my life of plenty back home to the simplicity of being on a trail. Simplicity isn’t a choice if it is the only option. Tying my shoes each morning, sipping coffee at sunrise, washing my socks in a hostel sink, these small things became anchors. Rituals have a way of transforming what is ordinary into something sacred. These small daily practices gave my life stability that we all long for. We all have things that are sacred to us–and I think deep down–we all long for what is sacred.  

Throughout Scripture, we see how God brings order out of chaos. The decision fatigue I face each day is a reminder of a great blessing, but also a deep distraction. The Camino reminded me that simplicity and ritual don’t shrink life–they give it shape. 

There is a spiritual longing in all of us  

There was one thing that shocked me most about doing this pilgrimage. The Camino de Santiago is one of the world’s oldest religious pilgrimages, culminating in a mass at the Cathedral in Santiago de Compostela. But whilst walking the Camino, I did not meet a single Christian. No one had a faith. Everyone I met was walking with those questions, or the adventure and the journey along the way. But no one with a deep faith or hope in God. 

As I walked, I listened to Lamorna Ash’s latest book, Don’t Forget We’re Here Forever: A New Generation’s Search for Religion. In it, she explores a generation’s turn to Christianity as she follows the lives and stories of those within and without faith. The stories of people who the church had hurt, those who carried brokenness and were longing for peace. Listening to this audiobook was often interrupted by the beautiful encounters I had with other pilgrims along the way.  

These conversations reminded me that, while not everyone has a faith, I believe there is a longing for something bigger than us, in all of us. Whether spoken or not, there was a hunger for transcendence, a desire to be part of a story with direction, with purpose. The rhythm and ritual of completing this pilgrimage was a sacred act, something that held deep meaning for everyone walking. The sense of adventure, journey or even telos (Greek for purpose or goal) that we were all walking towards in the end at the Cathedral of Santiago de Compostela, gave our days direction and purpose.  

As I walked the Camino, it was the highlight I didn’t expect. I came into this thinking I would want to be alone. Listening to scripture and praying all day, every day. However, in the end, the best parts were the stories and conversations I had with the people I met along the way.   

So, there it is: the seven things walking the Camino de Santiago taught me. It was, without a doubt, the most physically and emotionally demanding thing I have ever done. And yet, it taught me so much.  

We all carry questions. We all long for meaning. We all crave rhythm, connection, and the sacred in the midst of the ordinary. Although I returned with my mind still pondering questions left unanswered or new things that had come to the surface, I was reminded that life is found in the small steps we take and the people we take them with—echoes of the One who made us for relationship, for purpose, and pilgrimage. 

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9 min read

Harry Potter and the mysteries of death

Horcruxes and our digital consciousness

Jonathan is a priest and theologian who researches theology and comedy.

Hermoine rests her head on the shoulder of Harry Potter.
Harry and Hermione at the grave of his parents.
Warner Bros.

A couple of years ago I had a conversation with some friends that has stuck with me. One of them is a palliative care doctor, and we were discussing medical trends which seek the extension of life at all costs. My friends are Jewish, and we as were comparing religious notes, it was unsurprising that they asked me: "well what do Christians think about death?" 

I replied, without really thinking: "Well, death is the enemy that is defeated." Somewhat to my surprise, their response was quite negative. "Oh, I don't like that idea. That pushes us towards denying our mortality, and trans-humanism, and the inability to let aged relatives go. We need to become better at welcoming death, at recognising it as part of our humanity." 

And as I groped to try and explain why that wasn't quite what I meant, the best analogy I could find for articulating what Christians think about death came from Harry Potter. And in the years since that conversation, it is still the best analogy that I can find to talk about mortality. 

So, here is the version of what I wish I had said. 

The Harry Potter books have many themes, but above all they are about death. That may sound unlikely for a series of books apparently aimed at children, but the evidence stacks up... 

The main character is an orphan, and the majority of people he comes close to will die across the seven books. (Now seems as good a time as any to mention that the rest of this article will basically all be spoilers, so maybe stop now if you've been putting off reading the books for the last 20 years. I'm also going to assume you are at least reasonably familiar with the plot). 

Harry's life is defined by the death of his parents and his own close shave with mortality as a baby, and as the books continue the body count gets almost ludicrously high. 

Indeed, the author J.K. Rowling has said that Harry is "the prism through which I view death in its many forms." 

Unsurprisingly, given how central the theme is, there is a certain amount of explicit reflection on death, even if it is somewhat vague. Thus, we find that: "to the well organised mind, death is but the next great adventure." Dying hurts not at all, but is "quicker and easier than falling asleep." Those who die can "go on," perhaps by "boarding a train." 

If all of this sounds a touch sentimental and the sort of thing that might appear in bad funeral sermons, it is paired with descriptions of grief that are visceral and deeply moving. (I may have cried more than once whilst doing the "research" for this article). 

But where the discussion of death gets really interesting, at least to me, is in the plot, and the metaphysics that underpins it. By metaphysics I just mean the whole picture of the structure of reality that makes the world of Harry Potter work. 

And in this metaphysics we find that death is indeed an enemy. This becomes clear partly through the sheer excruciating depiction of loss that runs through the books - how could something that causes this much pain be anything but an enemy? - but in book seven it is also made explicit. 

In one of my favourite moments of the whole series, Harry stands before his parents' gravestone, and reads the epitaph: 

'"The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death"... A horrible thought came to him, and with it a kind of panic. "Isn't that a death Eater idea? Why is that there?" 

"It doesn't mean defeating death in the way the Death Eaters mean it, Harry," said Hermione, her voice gentle. "It means... you know... living beyond death. Living after death."' 

In Harry and Hermione's reaction to the quote on his parent's tombstone we find that there are multiple ways for death to be an enemy. 

The Deathly Hallows sounds eerily like a current technological advancement: the rising trend of griefbots.

Book seven, in fact, presents three ways to defeat death, and they are highly illuminating. 

Firstly, there are Horcruxes. This is Voldemort's project for immortality: the division of his soul via murder and the darkest magic, and the implantation of those parts of the soul into objects which guarantee that, even should he die, he will live on.  

This is, I think it's fair to say, not a vision of the death's vanquishing which the books present as appealing - Voldemort is the darkest wizard of living memory, and the creation of his Horcruxes takes him deeper into evil than anyone has ever gone. Yet it has strange parallels to various current attempts at death defiance. Dividing your soul up and placing it in objects sounds pretty similar to me to uploading your consciousness into a computer. 

Now I'm not saying that all transhumanists are evil wizards whose projects rely on murder, but I do wonder if the same impulse lies behind Horcruxes and downloaded consciousness. 

There is, in both, the same fear of death, the same refusal to accept that my life might end. And there is the same default assumption that the body doesn't really matter - that the centre of my being is somewhere else, and that I can separate it from this inconvenient vessel which is so subject to injury and decay. The inevitability of bodily death is acknowledged, but life can go on even if my body fails, because I can place myself into objects. What matters is my consciousness, and that can be made eternal. 

The second option is a little more complex: the Deathly Hallows. These are three strange, mysterious objects, possession of which promises to make the bearer "master of death." The wand that gives murderous power. The stone that brings back the dead. The cloak that conceals. 

The Hallows dress up their promise in esoteric garb - they offer a quest for the initiated that requires a certain embrace of mystery, and they certainly seem friendlier than Horcruxes, since no one has to die to make them.  

But in the end, as Dumbledore admits, they are not really that different from the Horcruxes, for those who seek them also respond to the temptation to defy death, just like Voldemort. And if Horcruxes are about preserving the soul in the face of the inevitability of bodily death, the Hallows tease the possibility of avoiding death altogether, through the exercise of power. 

The wand gives the power of invincibility and conquest: the avoidance of death through the murder of all who might threaten to kill. 

The cloak gives the power to hide, to keep out of trouble, to evade death by escape. 

And the stone? The stone overcomes the loss of death by bringing its victims back, by refusing to accept that those we love might leave us.  

Again, the Deathly Hallows sounds eerily like a current technological advancement: the rising trend of griefbots. There is the same attempt to respond to grief by clinging to simulations of those whom we mourn, and the same despair at the end of the line. For the dead do not belong with the living, we are told, and legend has it the first owner of the stone was driven to suicide. 

The Hallows attempt to deny death through power, and this is why Dumbledore found them so alluring, and so destructive: they promised to wind back his own loss while giving him the victory he thought would give his life meaning. 

And yet, in reality, even when Harry unites them all, they don't give what they promise. Indeed, they only work to their full power when they are used for humbler ambitions: to hide friends from danger, to perform wondrous magic without boasting in the glory of the wand, or to face death with the comforting presence of those who have gone before. 

For the stone only becomes available to Harry when he finally embraces the third way to defeat the death. The way his parents believed in.  

Death, in the Potter books, is defeated by dying. Or perhaps more specifically, by dying for love - love of children, love of friends, love of a world gone tragically wrong.  

Harry's mother protected her son from dying multiple times, through the power of her sacrificially loving surrender. Dumbledore, in a complex way, protects Malfoy and saves the Elder Wand from Voldemort, thereby protecting the whole wizarding world, through his voluntary death. Even Snape, in the bitterest and most twisted story of them all, ends up giving Harry what he needs to win and finding a measure of redemption, in and through his own murder. 

And, in the climax of this long, convoluted story, Harry avoids death by going willingly to die. Because he loves his friends. Because he hates others dying for him. Because he recognises the terrible duty he faces, the terrible path Dumbledore has laid out for him, and he loves too much to run. 

Voldemort is wrong. Love does conquer death. 

The parallels to the Christian vision of death are stark. The quote on the tombstone which sparks these reflections for Harry (and for me) is in fact from the Bible. "The last enemy that shall be defeated is death" is a profoundly Christian idea. 

Yet my friends were right to react negatively to what they thought I meant by death being an enemy. 

For, just like the good guys in Harry Potter, Christians have traditionally been suspicious of attempts at immortality on our own terms. The Bible, I would suggest, knows nothing of a technological defeat of death, whether through downloading our consciences, or radical life extension, or technologies of power. Death cannot be staved off by any of our own work. 

But this does not mean that death is a good thing, simply a part of human existence which we would do well to welcome and learn to get along with (though I do think we would do better to think about death more, and be more honest about its existence).  

Death is an enemy. It is the final enemy. We are right to rage against it. To grieve those whom we lose. To feel its existential weight. 

Yet, perhaps paradoxically, we should not fear it. For death is an enemy that has been vanquished, but vanquished through Jesus' death.  

Immortality is not, for Christians, something we achieve, but something that is given to us. We believe in the Saviour who dies, and who rises again, and in whose resurrection, as strange as it may sound, we also will be raised. Death is defeated by love, but it is not our love, it is God's love for us. 

This gift, according to the early Christian writers, can only be received by going through death, not by avoiding death. Indeed, Paul's letters, which make up most of the New Testament, are full of the insistence that the pattern of Christian life is always death first, then life. Death in baptism, to new life in Christ. Death to sin, to life in freedom. Bodily death, to bodily resurrection. 

And so, what I should have said to my friend, is that Hermione is right. Death is the final enemy to be defeated, but this does not mean the ways of the Death Eaters. It does not mean projects of immortality, whether rooted in science, or a mystery cult, or power over others. 

Rather it means it life after death - a life that is given to us, by our saviour who has been through death and defeated it. 

Death is the enemy but it is not our enemy to defeat. That victory was won for us, on Easter Sunday 2000 years ago, in a cemetery near Jerusalem, when Jesus rose again. 

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Do so by joining Behind The Seen. Alongside other benefits, you’ll receive an extra fortnightly email from me sharing my reading and reflections on the ideas that are shaping our times.
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